Week 3.10: Hi, my name is...

Week 3.10: Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I am an introvert.

Yes. It's true. There's my confession.

I know you're probably protesting right now...Give me a minute to define it...Your arguments will die off quickly.

First off: think of Introversion and Extroversion as being on either end of a continuum: We all have a bit of both.

Now: try to think of how a person recharges (yourself or someone else): Being alone? Or being with people?

Introverts recharge in solitude. Extroverts are energized by being with others.

Characteristics of an Introvert include:

• Enjoys time alone
• Considers only deep relationships as friends
• Feels drained after outside activities, even if they were fun
• Are often good listeners
• Appear calm and self-contained
• Think then speak or act

Characteristics of an Extrovert include:

• Talkative and assertive
• Gets energy from groups
• Enjoys being in the spotlight
• Loves to talk
• Doesn't enjoy being alone/quiet
• Jumps into the action

It has been alleged that our Western culture values extroversion. I would agree.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I'm an introvert.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I've been accused of being rude/antisocial/rebellious by sticking my nose in a book...on more than one occasion.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I've been told that I am being selfish/lazy/set-in-my-ways for shutting myself up in my bedroom. It's only to avoid a total breakdown, I assure you.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I have sensory issues. Sometimes the heater or air conditioner is too loud for me, so I turn them off. I can't stand the ceiling fan above my bed to be on the "high" setting. I can't sleep with light in my bedroom. I have been told that I have a "pregnant lady" nose when it comes to the trashcan. And sometimes I'd rather unload the dishwasher myself because I know how to do it quietly.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I usually want to walk alone...I don't even want to take the dog. People talk to people with dogs. I don't go on walks to talk to people.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I LOVE comfortable silence.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I think slumber parties are the dumbest idea ever. I've never enjoyed them...even as a kid...and I've called my parents in the middle of the night to come take me home to my own bed.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I can stay up all night talking with just one girlfriend.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I enjoy photographing weddings...where there are lots of people but I can hide behind my lens...and then hole up all week by myself to recover.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I'm agoraphobic. Afraid of crowds.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I love book friends because they don't require anything of me.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I love music...especially mellow, introspective, lyrical, searching music. I can fixate on an album or song and put it on "repeat" for longer than most people without getting sick of it. Some people would allege that I am almost "rain man" with how long I can listen to a song. But I can barely listen to music and drive at the same time.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I have always thought the idea of dating was torture on par with slumber parties.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I can blog my brains out...but I wouldn't bare my soul face-to-face with but a few.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I'm challenged with dealing with things that aren't concrete. If it's not concrete/looming eminent, I have tremendous difficulty discussing it.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and the more is not the merrier for me.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I've been told (with admiration) that I march to the beat of my own drum. The truth is, I don't care about the "popular" drums.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I drop out of or refuse to enter debates that are uncontrolled and/or lively.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and my greatest fear is becoming famous for something/anything...I feel quite sorry for the accidentally famous.

Hi, my name is...Sarah, and I grew up hating the sound of the phone and doorbell ringing. I still hate it when people come to my door unannounced. I would probably run Ed McMahon off if he came to the door.

Incidentally, I just had a funny discussion this week about the whole "Ed McMahon coming to the door" scenario and the person I was talking to said: "You probably think the giant check is too much, right?" Exactly. The giant check is too big and the balloons are crowding my face and etc. Did I mention I'm claustrophobic? How an introvert can be a claustrophobe is beyond me...

I am an introvert.

There are perks, though!

Advantages include:

• works well with others, especially in one-to-one relationships
• maintains long-term friendships
• flexible
• independent
• strong ability to concentrate
• self-reflective
• responsible
• creative, out-of-the-box thinking
• analytical skills that integrate complexity
• studious and smart

The following are some links that refer to the whole dynamic of Introvert/Extrovert. I took excerpts from these sites in the information I provided above.

If you know an introvert, show a little mercy and compassion. It'll speak volumes. Quietly. Just the way we like it...

Meyers Briggs on Introverts
Definition of Introvert
Definition of Extrovert
Introvert Personality Traits & Famous Introverts
Blog Post by an Introvert

And now, in closing, I leave you with quotes about introverts:

"Leave an extrovert alone for two minutes and he will reach for his cell phone. In contrast, after an hour or two of being socially “on,” we introverts need to turn off and recharge. My own formula is roughly two hours alone for every hour of socializing. This isn’t antisocial. It isn’t a sign of depression. It does not call for medication. For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. Our motto: “I’m okay, you’re okay—in small doses." -Jonathan Rauch

"What does an introvert do when he's left alone? He stays alone." -Jeremy Jackson "Bean and Me" -Jenni Ferrari-Adler (Alone in the Kitchen with an Eggplant: Confessions of Cooking for One and Dining Alone)

"Having people in different optimal environments increases the chances of survival of the human race as a whole. It is nature's way to preserve her species." -Marti Olsen Laney (The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World)

"The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases." -Carl Jung

And finally:

"I'm an introvert... I love being by myself, love being outdoors, love taking a long walk with my dogs and looking at the trees, flowers, the sky." -Audrey Hepburn

I hear you, Audrey. Except for the dog thing, of course.